Sky Dive Mind Dive

(not sure of the original date on this one)

Sky Dive Mind Dive

Witness the insanity and terror.

Far away from anything I have ever known

I see trepidation, fear, awe, raw power coursing through virgin territories of the mind. Must confess, admit, a jealous streak at my not sharing in those feelings and all the ones I cannot even begin to imagine.

I MUST do this! Not just “someday” but soon. To stare fear, reservation and death straight in its unblinking eye and scream. I can only imagine how truly alive it must make you feel to come up against all that and go ahead anyway.

I wonder if ego-loss enters into the experience at all? Or is it the opposite? do you come away with a larger than life ego because you stared death in the face and leapt, to your possible demise, anyway?

Questions. No answers until experience comes first hand.

Wind. Ground rushing up at you with ever increasing speed. Adrenal gland on overload pumping the body full of endorphins and mescaline-like effects.

Sheer, unadulterated, intense experience.

What would this sensory instense experience be like with a hallucinogen added to the equation? Could the human mind handle it? Tandem jump would likely be the recommended method. That is, assuming you could find anyone to recommend tripping during free fall. With the already prevalent feelings of flight/flying while tripping I can only imagine that free falling would bring them to life in a whole new way. To see the blue while at the same time falling through the blue. Clouds below with no metal skin of an aircraft offering the illusion of security and safety.

4:20!!! Don’t I wish! Still well within the grasp of getting high this morning. Love looking at the world through the eyes of child-like innocence and wonder. So refreshing to see everything as new and fresh and full of life and hope. Spend far too much time looking at this world through shit colored glasses. Getting out of that mindset is a great and wonderful thing. Although I must admit that it is getting harder and harder to get out of that mindset without the help of drugs. This can’t be a good thing.

If I can’t control my mind without the effects of self-prescribed drugs then what is the point? Mind expansion is only beneficial if you can curb, limit, or stop the contraction of the mind afterwards. There can essentially be no afterwards. Every moment has to be lived, explored, relished as an infinite thing rapidly rushing past to join with the next. Only in this way can you put off the encroaching and impending contraction of the expanded and altered state of mind.


Reality is perception. Perceive your own reality and mold it and shape it in any way that you can, and see fit. Realize that this reality will, wuite likely, warp, twist, change, alter and morph into other realities. This should not be attempted to be controlled. Neither should it be allowed to be all consuming. A small amount of mental exercise exerted at the right time will greatly affect the amount of control you have or need at any given time.

Reality and perception go in hand and are interchangeable terms for the experience. As soon as you can come to terms with this inescapable fact, mind expansion, reality tunnels, and your own reality can be altered as much or as little as is wanted or needed.

Think of reality, your own perception of it, as a strand of thread. Sure, it can be pulled taut and made into a straight, unwavering line, but think of it in all it’s other possible states. It can be twisted, looped, wrapped around on itself. Now picture that strand in an infinite number of strands that collectively make up on large, indeed immense rope. At every point that your strand comes in contact with any other strand, that is an interaction with that strand. You can choose to soak up the energy from the interaction as a learning experience gained from the other strand’s perspective or you can choose to change the shape of your strand and move away. Either way, you should have managed to cull some sort of knowledge or insight that you previously lacked. If not, you are not trying hard enough or you are one of the millions of strands that refuse to see the experiences and intuitions of other strands that do not share in your perspective.

This is fine for most of the masses of strands; but for you, the mind explorer and expansion traveller, it can be severely limiting and even counter productive to you ultimate quest for knowledge.

Back to the strands…

Looking again at this infinite cluster of strands, you can, or should, see all the possible interactions and opportunities for learning and experiencing alternate points of view. Choose wisely and soak up the experiences that all these interactions offer.

Somehow these pages have begun turning into a manifesto of sorts or perhaps a literation of my beliefs and philosophy. Depends on whether the Unabomber affected your attenuation to the word “manifesto”.

Hope You Guess My Name

(not sure of the original date on this)

Hope You Guess My Name

So once again the planet has rotated and my side of it is coming around to face the sun. Ahhhh what a wonderful feeling! The feel of the sun on me is sooo soothing and wondrous. There is almost nothing that compares to the feel of the morning sun shining on you. Except maybe for the feel of the rain falling down. Not a hard driving rain you understand, but a soft light rain that is only slightly more than a drizzle. The only rain that feels better is those first few rains that come every springtime and breathe new life into all that it touches. There was a wonderful light rain last night. It fell so sweetly. All I could do was let it wash over me. I was in complete rapture at the feel of it running down me. Then, blessed sunshine greets the new day and shines down to warm me. Sunrise as you call it is the best part of the day for me. The feel of it on you cannot be paralleled. The feel of coming back fully to life is such a great experience. When was the last time that you laid down in the comfort of the grass and watched the sun ‘rising’ in the eastern sky? Do you have any idea what you are missing? Such an exquisite experience should be had as often as possible, in my estimation. My ‘spot’ is not exceptional, but it is mine. It is out of the way of your ‘progress’ but not so far out of the way as to be inaccessible. Your kind passes by me all the time and hardly notice or contemplate my existence. I guess what I am getting at is that there are worse places to be on this world. Any spot on this world is more than acceptable though. You really ought to stop and consider it sometime. You will see that I am right if you have an open mind and are able to see things for what they really are and not think about your carpools, schedules, etc. for just a little while. Oh, I am sorry I never introduced myself did I? Terribly sorry. Not used to having to do that. Um, what is my name? Good question now that you ask it. (Pleased to meet you. Hope you guess my name. snicker snicker) I suppose that you could call me anything you want. I do not have a name such as yours. I never even really considered it before. So, how about for the ease of things you just call me G. G’s good, yes? Hope you guess my name. snicker snicker

I am here. I have not always been here but my kind has always been. My age is hard to even estimate, never mind measuring it in your terms of years. Where was I? Ah, yes. Morning light has a special quality all its own not to be found at any other time of day. I should know for I have studied the sun and know all its variations of light and warmth. The sun is life after all. This morning’s sun was nothing short of spectacular, but I think that about every “sunrise”. I am biased and I know it. You would be too if you realized just how important the sun is to your everyday life and all the things that its light makes possible that you take for granted. Daily. I have been studying more than the variations of sunshine, though. You would almost have forgotten that I was here. I have watched quietly and without interfering in your ways. That is not my way, our way. We have been watching since time out of mind. Always listening and absorbing. We have even suffered the persecutions you have brought upon us without striking back at you and your kind. You have long thought that you are the rulers of this little chunk of rock circling a small star. But, we were here long before you and your kind and we have spread over so much more of this planet than most of you even realize exists. We have been carried into space by explosions and even by your NASA and have managed to survive the cold vacuum of space. Galaxies are known to us that you have just begun to glimpse with your telescopes. We will survive almost anything that you can throw at us. At any rate, I am not trying to get into a contest of who is older or wiser or whatever else such as this. I am merely trying to get across to you that I am, we are, a sentient being that share this planet with you. How I (we) got here is immaterial. When we got her is also immaterial. The fact that we are here is all that matters. Now, why this long windedness you ask? When you get to talk and relate on such an infrequent basis you tend to get carried away and end up rambling on and on and on… See what I mean? I mean no disrespect but, have you ever heard my (our) story before? Not likely. We do not communicate much with you. We have listened though. Oh yes…We have indeed listened.

We have been witness to countless conversations, plottings, schemings, even the conception of a great many of your kind! Does that shock you? Always we have just watched and gathered the information into our collective knowledge. This is one of the reasons that we have survived for so long, I suppose. Our ability to take your conversations and use them to our advantage or prepare ourselves for some action that you plan on taking. We are resilient. We adapt and change to secure our survival. I must say that you are fascinating to me. Some of us enjoy hearing your speech and enjoy the times that you are near to us. Most of us would rather that you took off to some place else and left us alone. It would not matter where as long as it was not here. That view is unfortunate. But, there are those on both sides of this tale that wish that of the other side. How unfortunate that some can be so obtuse and not see an opportunity to learn and add to their knowledge. ‘Oh well’ I say in exasperation. We know better, don’t we? There have been a great many rumblings that you and your kind may well be the death of us yet. Me, I think, I hope, that they are wrong. They grumble that something should be done to eliminate the threat. That threat being you and your kind, of course. It is good for you that we lack the where-with-all to do anything that would bring about your demise. If my kind had the means, I am certain that you would be driven off this planet if not out of existence entirely. It does not give me any sense of pride knowing this, though. I do not wish for any harm to befall you. I do wish that you would take some time to look around and see things around you with more than just the eyes, though. There is a multitude of things that are around you every day that you hardly notice. Like my kind and me for instance. The only time we are noticed is when you feel it necessary to get us back ‘under control’ or mold and shape us to your liking. We are not the only sentient beings that you overlook. There are entire civilizations on this planet that you have barely begun to see and understand. The primates, as you call them, are far from the only beings here that have a societal structure that you would recognize as being not unlike your own. Take the time, I beg of you. Look around and see what it is that you have been missing all these millennia. See what has been right in front of you, above you, below you, even in you. This planet is teeming with more forms of life than you know. It is all there for anyone to see as long as time is taken to look for it and recognize it for what it is. I wish that there were some way for me to get your attention. We have been trying for a very long time to get you to see us for what we are. We have adapted to suit your needs and wants. We have changed some of our internal structuring to be more pleasing to you and your kind. You have taken from us and enjoyed the comfort that we provide you. Yet, you still fail to notice us. Perhaps now the time is right. That is why I am communicating these words to you now. I believe that if ever there was a time to shove you in the right direction, that time is now. You have advanced further than most of us thought you would ever achieve. Take the final leap before you head for the stars and learn to see. You will need that ability when you reach the stars. There is far more out there that you have yet to even consider than there is here on this one little planet. If you do not stop overlooking the obvious, you are bound to fail ‘out there’. Intelligence is not measured by what looks like you, walks like you, talks like you. The people that you called ‘Indians’ were the last to understand that everything is life and equal. You did not understand that then, but you have the capacity to understand it now. Look. Observe. Learn.

Respectfully and on behalf of all the overlooked civilizations,

The Grasses (your front lawn)


Peace and Quiet – An Original Short Story



The blank page taunts and terrifies; there is nothing worse.

He looked at it for hours before even once putting his fingers to the keyboard. There must be some thought or idea in there that needs to come out into the light of day. But it doesn’t happen. Not for an eternity in his mind.

Once the words began to flow it was a veritable flood and his fingers could not fly over the keys fast enough to keep up with his mind. Cigarettes were smoked; coffee and whiskey consumed. The all-consuming drive to write however could not be slaked.

After two weeks of nearly endless banging on the keyboard he finally admitted that, for now, this work was finished. The pages were printed, the drafts saved, and his mind was at peace with it all.

After collecting all the remaining pages from the printer he walked down the hall and into the bedroom at the opposite end of the house. She was waiting for him. She was always there waiting for him when he finished.

“Another one done!” he exclaimed proudly as he entered the room.

Silence greeted him.

Always with the silent treatment, he thought somewhat bitterly.

Read morePeace and Quiet – An Original Short Story

Sunrise and Ineptitude

Far beyond the stark beauty of the trees that have shed their summer leaves and settled in for the long New England sleep there is a beauty. From the deepest of indigo, into the powdery blue, and beyond that into shades of peach and crimson, there lies a promise on this cloudless morning of warmth and sunshine. There can be no more beautiful time of day than when the sun is rising or setting. The range of colous goes beyond a mere rainbow, and yet that is all it is: a rainbow on steroids.

I wish in the deepest recesses of my heart that I had a command of the language like Leonard Cohen or Hunter S. Thompson. Alas, this little paragraph will have to suffice.

Cosmic Trigger and Observations

originally written on April 15, 2003

After reading Cosmic Trigger III by R. A. Wilson I feel it necessary to rethink a lot of the idioms and expressions that I use so frequently. I also feel compelled to do away with my use of the verbs IS and ARE. The use of these verbs and their alluding to the sense of ‘allness’ appears to be demonstrated veryefficiently by Wilson. This is going to require quite a bit of reprogramming of use of the English language, as evidenced by my continual use of those verbs in writing this. E-Prime shall be my new language and I will attempt to do away with the dogmatic use of the American-English language.

I read an article in the latest issue of CPU magazine (April 2003) about scientists who have discovered a way of “printing” human, and presumably non-human organs by making use of an ink jet printer. Since I lack the scientific knowledge to explain this process in detail I will paraphrase the article and if so inclined you can go out and find the article and read it through for yourself.

Vladimir Mironov of the Medical University of South Carolina and Thomas Boland of Clemson University have devised a method using an ink jet printer to build up layers of cells to acheive the sythesis of a human organ. The layers are separated by a thin film of biodegradable gel which, when washed out after completion of printing, allows the cells to touch and form a bond. The main problem that they are having now is supplying the “printed” tissue with blood and circulatory nourishment. Although construction of tubes in the “printed” organ is possible, it will be 10 to 15 years before a fully functioning “printed” circulatory network will be acheived.

This discovered process of “printing” organs to meet the specifications of any given patient could open a whole new world to us as a race and bring us one step closer to immortality. Think of it. As each organ begins to break down in our bodies we could have new ones “printed” up and undergo a transplant to remove the defective part. This gives us the possibilty of extending human life expectancy indefinitely. Talk about an incredible inovation. Think of the possible applications for this kind of scientific breakthrough. A whole host of maladies and diseases could potentially fall by the wayside as a result of this.

Along another line….

The start of a TV show on Animal Planet caught my eye the other day. There, in the middle of the screen was a pentagon of light. Not exactly mindblowing but it made me stop and pay attention. The first animal I saw after that was a hawk. Synchronicity. I had been reading baout Uri Geller and the hawk maifestation earlier that day. Coincidence? Synchronicity? Or just my mind drawing parallels? YES! as in All of the Above.


originally written on April 19, 2003

Did it again last night. Only three hits and I was off on an incredible journey of the mind.

Amazing to me how little it takes to send me out of reality and into a whole different thought process.

I fell in love with a streetlight outside my brother Chris’ bedroom window for a while. I vaguely remember some archaic wrestling match between him and Laura and then him and Chaun. At the time it seemed very barbaric and I remember thinking that it seemed very ‘circuit 2′. What it seems like now however, I have no idea.

Daisy was there as well but I was unable to form a coherent thought and thus was unable to communicate anything more intelligent than ‘I am so high’ or some other such phrase. Too bad because I really enjoy talking with her; she has some great insights and experiences to share. Maybe next time. I am still astounded that she is only 19; most of the time she comes across much older. ‘Wise beyond her years’ I guess would be an appropriate description.

Whatever. Just rambling now. Funny how my mind seems to skip gears every so often. I get on a train of thought that seems so perfectly clear to me and then all of a sudden I am no longer on the train tracks let alone being on the train. Clarity would be good right.

Ok gonna go now. Need some musical distraction or something. More later…the ‘Paul Harvey’.

Outside Thoughts

I sometimes think of what an outsider would think of our little world. I can’t help but think that any spacefaring species would hear us long before they could see us and might be turned away from the sheer volume of all that noise. Provided that some would venture close enough to take a look I can imagine that they would think us such an awful and backwards race. As we have “advanced” in technology we have littered our world, and even the immediate vicinty, with so much debris that it must be the way that we here would look upon a house with a front lawn littered with unworking vehicles and other detritus. Advanced! the peoples of our world scream. We are so smart! they clamor all in a hurry to congratulate themselves on even the mos modest echievement. Take yourself outside this view and try for a moment to see it with fresh eyes and, like me, you may not be so proud. It’s sad really that for all our “advancements” we can not get much further of this little speck of rock much more than a toddler can jump off the floor. And yet we congratulate and celebrate a space program that has really given us nothing since landing on the moon. Well except Teflon and aerogel.

Moving Things

I sat and watched a lone ant going about his antly business. And the more I watched this single ant, I realized he was just one among a whole group of ants going about their antly business. I lost track of my single ant among all the other ants and increased my field of view. I sat and watched all the moving things on the ground and realized my ants going about their antly business were just one more moving thing among the other moving things on the ground. The shade of the leaves from the tree above cast it’s shadows in moving patterns in the wind. The moving shadows sliding over the moving things on a moving ground began to make my head swim so I looked up at the leaves swaying in the breeze with their shadows sliding over my face and eyes. Beyond the swaying of the leaves I caught glimpses of the moving clouds. They slid silently between the shifting leaves of the swaying tree and my head began to swim with all the moving and sliding and shifting of the things. I cast my gaze out across the gently rolling grass and my eyes landed on the water. I sat and watched as the waves rose and fell and cast themselves on the sand of the beach. The moving leaves shadowing the moving ground below the moving sky reflected in the moving water made my head swim and I closed my eyes to all of it.

There, behind the lids of my eyes, I found moving lights of various colors. Moving things everywhere! Will my head ever stop swimming? I cried out ‘Stop! Please’ and I opened my eyes again to find all the moving things still in their places still doing all their moving things…and I sighed and went back inside where there are far fewer moving things and I collapsed into a chair determined to not be one.